How to Stay Calm When Your Baby Won’t Stop Crying

Having a baby is one of the most beautiful, rewarding experiences—but let’s be real, it can also be incredibly stressful. Nothing tests your patience quite like a baby who just won’t stop crying. Whether you’re in the middle of the night running on two hours of sleep or in the grocery store getting sympathetic (or judgmental) stares, it can feel overwhelming. If you’re struggling to keep your cool when your baby is inconsolable, you’re not alone. I’ve been there, and I know how frustrating and exhausting it can be.

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My Personal Experience: Navigating Colic, PPD, and No Village

When my son was a newborn, he was colicky. And when I say colicky, I mean he cried for hours on end, and nothing seemed to soothe him. My husband worked long days, leaving early in the morning and coming home late, which meant I was handling most of it alone. To make matters worse, I didn’t have a village. No family nearby, no close mom friends to call for support—just me, an exhausted, overwhelmed new mom trying to survive each day.

I remember nights sitting in the dark, rocking him, feeling completely drained, both physically and emotionally. The isolation was suffocating. On top of everything, I was battling postpartum depression. The constant crying, the lack of sleep, and the weight of motherhood with no real support system made me feel like I was drowning. I would tell myself, “Just make it through the next five minutes,” because thinking beyond that felt impossible.

Looking back, I wish I had given myself more grace. I wish I had known that it was okay to step away for a moment to breathe, that I wasn’t a bad mom for feeling completely overwhelmed. If you’re in the thick of it right now, please know—you are not alone. It does get better, and you are doing an incredible job, even if it doesn’t feel like it.

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Understanding Why Babies Cry

Before diving into ways to stay calm, it helps to understand why your baby might be crying. Sometimes, knowing why can make it a little easier to deal with the how long it lasts. Here are some common reasons babies cry:

• Hunger – Newborns eat frequently, and sometimes they cry just because they’re ready for their next feeding.
• Dirty diaper – Some babies are more sensitive than others to a wet or dirty diaper.
• Gas or discomfort – If your baby is arching their back, clenching their fists, or has a tight belly, they might have gas or colic.
• Overstimulation – Too much noise, bright lights, or activity can overwhelm your baby.
• Sleepiness – An overtired baby can be just as fussy as a hungry one.
• Teething pain – If your baby is around 4-6 months old, teething could be to blame.
• Wanting comfort – Babies sometimes cry simply because they need to be held and soothed.

Understanding that crying is their main way of communicating can help reframe how you respond to it.

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How to Stay Calm When Your Baby Won’t Stop Crying

1. Take Deep Breaths (Yes, Really)

I know, I know—when you’re on the verge of tears yourself, the last thing you want to hear is just breathe. But there’s real science behind it. Deep breathing lowers stress hormones and helps bring your body back to a calmer state. Try this:

• Inhale deeply through your nose for four seconds.
• Hold your breath for four seconds.
• Exhale slowly through your mouth for six seconds.
• Repeat as needed.

This simple technique can help you reset and approach the situation with a clearer mind.

2. Set Your Baby Down in a Safe Place

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a step back. Put your baby in a safe place like a crib or bassinet and take a few minutes to collect yourself. Your baby might continue crying, but a short break can help prevent frustration from turning into anger or panic.

Pro Tip: A white noise machine can help soothe your baby while you step away for a moment. This one has been a lifesaver for so many parents!

3. Try the 5 S’s Method

Dr. Harvey Karp, author of The Happiest Baby on the Block, introduced the “5 S’s” technique for soothing babies:

1. Swaddle – Wrapping your baby snugly can create a womb-like environment.
2. Side or Stomach Position – Holding your baby on their side or stomach (while awake and supervised) can help calm them.
3. Shush – A gentle “shhh” sound mimics the noise of the womb.
4. Swing – Rocking or bouncing your baby in a rhythmic motion can be soothing.
5. Suck – Offering a pacifier or allowing them to nurse can help comfort them.

Many parents swear by this method, and it’s worth trying!

4. Wear Your Baby

Sometimes, all your baby needs is to be close to you. A baby carrier or wrap can work wonders in keeping them calm while allowing you to be hands-free. This was the baby carrier I used and walked miles with in my little apartment soothing my son.

5. Turn on White Noise or Music

White noise, lullabies, or even your own humming can provide a soothing background sound that helps drown out other stimuli. Some babies love classical music, while others respond to nature sounds. Experiment with different sounds to see what works best for your little one.

6. Take Turns with Your Partner

If your partner is available, ask for help. Tag-teaming can prevent burnout and give each parent a much-needed break. If you’re solo parenting, consider calling a trusted friend or family member to step in for even 20 minutes.

7. Step Outside for a Breath of Fresh Air

Changing the environment can sometimes make a difference for both you and your baby. If you have a backyard or patio, stepping outside and gently rocking your baby in the fresh air might be just what you both need.

8. Remind Yourself: Crying Is Not a Reflection of Your Parenting

This one is big. It’s so easy to feel like a failure when your baby won’t stop crying. But babies cry—it’s what they do. It doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. Give yourself grace and remember that this stage won’t last forever.

9. Seek Help If You Need It

If your baby’s crying seems excessive or you’re feeling completely overwhelmed, reach out for support. Pediatricians, lactation consultants, and postpartum support groups can provide guidance and reassurance. You don’t have to do this alone.

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You’ve Got This, Mama

Dealing with a crying baby can feel like an endurance test, but you are not alone. Remember to breathe, step away if needed, and use soothing techniques to help both you and your baby feel better.

What strategies have helped you stay calm when your baby won’t stop crying? Drop a comment below—I’d love to hear your tips and experiences!